Wednesday, 29 July 2009

The Man in the Mirror

The hair project has been, I think, a success. I’ve had my hair in the same style for many years now. It’s been down to the small of my back with a brush pulled through it to keep it neat. I’d normally tie it back, because it being in my face irritated me. I started growing my hair in earnest when I was 14, and have only really cut it one time since, in 2003. Ever since I was in double digits, I wanted long hair. I’ve had it for a long time now. I wanted a change.

It may seem like only a small change; Allegra cut the hair forwards of my ears to chin length. The effect is that I now have wide ‘bangs’, or ‘ears’ at the front while the back is still almost waist-length.

I wear it down, and am becoming accustomed to the feel of my ears on my cheeks and the sight of them in the edges of my vision.

The first time I looked in the mirror after they were cut was an horrific moment. My first thought was that I looked like Prince Valium. My second was that I looked like I was sixteen again. Sixteen was not a happy time for me, and that was due in a large part to my chin-length hair. Seeing that face staring back in the mirror was... a challenge.

The unwritten rule is that if people don’t comment on your new hairstyle, they hate it. You can imagine, then, my fears and thoughts about debuting my new locks. Especially at the steam barbecue. And then bringing it into work on Monday. Every silence was a condemnation.

To my surprise, there were more compliments than silence. People who don’t normally notice told me it looked good and brought out the shape of my face.

It hasn’t laid that sixteen-year-old ghost to rest, but I’m seeing it less and less in the mirror.

It sounds vein, I’m sure, but my long hair has long been a defining trait of mine. When I was fourteen, I decided that society was going to hate me no matter what I did, so I would do what I wanted. And that was to have long hair. I've stuck with it, through thick and thin, fashion, impulse and accidents. It’s the one thing I’ve had that no one could take away from me or take control of. We all have our battlefields, I suppose.

So, I have a slightly different hairstyle. And I’m growing quite fond of it.


Jo Thomas said...

I reckon you should have gone manga... Well, until I see the photos, anyway ;)

Foxie said...

I was considering dying my ears a varity of colourful shades--starting with purple. Then I figured I should probably stay respectable, in case I need to attend interviews. And I could never get them to stick up the way they do in manga, anyway.